My "No Bullshit" Approach to Communication: Why I Block You (and Why It's Not Personal)

What's Up Viva Fam,

Ever feel like your time and energy are constantly being drained by meaningless interactions? Like you're stuck in a loop of polite conversations that go nowhere? If so, you're not alone. I've been there, and frankly, I'm over it. I've developed a super clear, efficient, and, yes, some might say "harsh" approach to communication: if there's no clear intention, there's no conversation. And if you waste my time, you're getting blocked. Period.

Time and Energy Aren't Free: They're My Most Valuable Assets

For me, talking to someone isn't just about exchanging pleasantries; it's a transaction of my time and energy. And let me tell you, both are incredibly precious resources that I simply can't afford to waste. I'm juggling a lot in my life, and every minute, every ounce of mental bandwidth, needs to count.

My "no bullshit" policy isn't about being rude; it's about being resourceful. If an interaction doesn't have a defined purpose and a clear trajectory, it becomes a drain. And frankly, I'm a firm believer in radical self-preservation when it comes to my energy. Empty conversations, vague intentions, or relationships that just flatline are direct threats to my well-being. That's why my "block" button is my best friend.

I'm Looking for Authenticity, Not Just Talk

I crave genuine connection, whether it's building a strong friendship, a solid business partnership, or a deep romantic relationship. When someone reaches out with a flimsy "I like you" or messages me off and on without sharing anything about themselves, it's a huge red flag.

What's the point? If you're not going to invest, if you're not going to be clear about why you're even talking to me, then what's my purpose in that conversation?

• "I like you"? Blocked. That's a "you" problem if you can't articulate anything more.

  
  

• "I want to be friends"? Approved! But the clock's ticking. If after a month you're still offering empty conversations, not sharing who you are, not initiating or accepting invites, and communicating infrequently... blocked. What's the point of a "friendship" that exists only in sporadic texts?

  
  

• "I want to do business"? Approved! But you've got one month to get to the point of your offer, and it better be well-thought-out. My business is my future, and I don't entertain vague ideas.

  
  

• "I'm interested in you and want to date"? Approved, but the stakes are higher here. My criteria are even harsher. To be honest, you'd probably have a better chance going the friend route first. I need to know you're real and serious before I even consider opening my heart.

My "Niceness" Isn't an Open Invitation

Here's something important to understand: just because I'm being sweet and nice doesn't mean the clock isn't ticking or that my guard is down. That's just basic social courtesy. It's not an invitation for an undefined, low-effort connection. My kindness should never be mistaken for a lack of boundaries or a willingness to have my time wasted.

If I block you once and you manage to come back (and trust me, I'll know), just know I'm analyzing your every move. Waste my time a second time, and you're permanently blocked. I don't care how close we were. You will never get a third chance.

It's Not Paranoia, It's Strategic Discernment

Some might call this harsh, or even paranoid. I call it strategically discerning. My approach is a sophisticated and rigorous boundary system born from a deep understanding of my own needs and past experiences. I've learned, often the hard way, that protecting my emotional well-being means refusing to settle for interactions that don't serve a purpose or offer genuine connection.

I'm not inventing threats; I'm observing and responding to patterns of behavior that undermine my sense of safety and efficiency. In a world where I'm already managing an incredible amount, being this clear and firm about my communication is not just a preference, it's a necessary act of self-preservation and efficiency.

Tips for Successful Conversation with Me:

So, how do you navigate this "no bullshit" approach and build a meaningful connection? It's pretty simple:

1. State Your Intent Early: When you reach out, tell me why.

   
   

   • For business: When you reach out, tell me why. "Hey, I saw your podcast, and I'd love to connect as a fellow creative," or "I'm looking for business opportunities and think we might align on X."

     
     

   • For friendship: "I've been looking to connect with more people who are into [shared interest, e.g., spiritual growth, content creation, parenting], and your vibe really resonates. I'd love to explore building a genuine friendship."

     
     

   • For dating: "I'm genuinely interested in getting to know you better with the hope of a serious relationship. I appreciate your directness and wanted to be clear about my intentions from the start."

   
   

2. Be Prepared to Share (Mutually): If you're looking for friendship or dating, be ready to offer genuine insights about yourself, not just ask questions. Connection is a two-way street.

   
   

3. Initiate Action: If you express interest in meeting or collaborating, follow through. Suggest concrete plans or next steps. Don't leave it vague.

   
   

4. Communicate Consistently (If the Intent Calls for It): If it's an ongoing relationship, make an effort to maintain communication frequency that matches the relationship's purpose. Sporadic, low-effort messages won't cut it.

   
   

5. Respect My Time: Get to the point. If it's business, present your offer clearly and concisely. If it's personal, show that you value my time by being present and purposeful in our interactions.

   
   

My time is valuable. My energy is precious. If you want to communicate with me, come with a purpose. Otherwise, don't be surprised when the door closes.

What's your biggest communication pet peeve, and how do you handle people who consistently cross your boundaries? Share your thoughts in the comments below!